5 Years Old

Apparently my blog can go to kindergarten now. Good, maybe it’ll learn how to update itself.

I always intend to write more. But with my last post being so heavy it has felt strange to follow up with something fluffy, even though I don’t want to write about only the hard stuff. I do tend to share more up on my tumblr but even that is random and infrequent.

If you have stuck around despite the blog silence, thanks for reading! Hopefully I’ll figure out just what the heck to do with this space.

The Uncomfortable Truth Of My Late Marriage.

This may be hard to read, it has certainly been hard to write, but please bear with me through this.

I want to write this out mainly for me. I feel that recounting my experiences will help me continue to process and heal from them. I also want to get this out there because my former marriage has drastically shaped who I am today, and how I interact with the world. Knowing this should help you understand where I’m coming from and why I react the way I do to certain situations and people.

Continue reading

Triumphant Return! Or Something Like That.

At Much Ado About Sebastopol

It has been quite a while, hasn’t it?

The last year or so has been one hell of a roller coaster ride. I’ve battled severe anxiety and depression, gotten out of an emotionally abusive marriage, faced poverty, and near homelessness. But I’m still here, in one piece, and rebuilding my life better than before. As things are stabilizing, I’m hoping to bring BFGG more silly gaming adventures, geeky craft tutorials, and perhaps a venture into vlogging.

So welcome back! Let’s hope this sticks. 😀

Oh My Minecraft

For a good chunk of ye olde internets Minecraft is a phenomenon that isn’t new at all. In fact I have several friends who are dedicated Miners (or Crafters? Steve-Heads?) and while the game always seemed interesting I have a pathetic laptop so I resigned myself to admire the work people were putting into things like HyruleCraft and just not play the game.

Then Minecraft: Xbox 360 Edition was released. On May 9th. I tried the demo on the 10th. Paid the 1600 MS points for the full game on the 11th. Spent hours and hours and hours mining and building and dying in lava. It is fairly safe to say, I just might have a Minecraft problem.

With the latest update for Minecraft 360, that problem just got worse.

There’s a good reason this post has taken me so long to get around to it, I keep getting distracted. By distracted I totally mean lost in yet another ravine. While we’re still missing quite a bit from the PC version the addition of random villages, ravines, abandoned mineshafts and strongholds are a lot of fun to explore. My creative world has 5 villages, and so far 2 ravines with mineshafts in them, but no strongholds yet. I’m hoping to eventually connect the villages via a rail system and then build them out.

ZOMG, the cobblestone, all the cobblestone.

A castle gate – pre-update build.

The one issue I’ve found with the latest update is my two pre-update survival maps are being taken over by ice and snow. The Starks aren’t crazy, Winter really is coming. I vaguely remember some early PC players talking about this winter spread after an update years ago, so hopefully it will be fixed with the next big update. Until then I’m scrambling to greenhouse all my farms so they don’t get iced over. I’ll castle in and survive the winter. The stackable food changes helps with this a lot. As well as being able to get more than just feathers and leather out of chickens and cows.

Despite the appeal of building ALL the things, Minecraft popped up at very opportune time for me. I don’t want to go into to much detail lest this turn into a “Very Special episode of BigFatGeekGirl” but things were not so good in my world and Minecraft provided a very necessary sense of order. When everything around you is chaos, it really helps to have a place you can go to where you are in complete control. Even as odd as the water and lava physics can be, once you learn how they work they are easy to manipulate. And so Minecraft became a haven.

With that I’m off to hopefully find a stronghold in my creative map. If I do I’ll share the seed because then it will really be the best Minecraft 360 seed EVER. Until then check out this awesome creative build from Redditor Colonel_Popcorn: MouseCraft!

N7 Special Ops, I love you all.

I’m finally writing about Mass Effect 3, but I’m not talking about the single player campaign.

Multiplayer Goodness

Image from masseffect.bioware.com

I’m here to confess my love and admiration for the multiplayer experience.

For the longest time I’ve been afraid to play online games, despite my love of gaming. I’ve heard so many horror stories of harassment (examples are illustrated at Fat, Ugly or Slutty) that I chose to avoid it rather than try to blend in.

But then Mass Effect 3 came along. I was SUPER excited to play this game. J pre-ordered me the Collector’s Edition for Christmas and I was going to take my various bad-ass FemSheps and take back Earth! Fuck Yeah! Then I hit a point in my first play through where even though I was being as good and diplomatic as can be and doing ALL the side quests, I was not satisfied by my readiness rating. I needed to be super prepared to kick the Reapers asses like a Girl Scout on PCP.

So I started bugging my friends who were playing. Most of them were engrossed in their SP campaign and didn’t want to try multiplayer yet. Finally I get a friend to join in. We start out as little level 1s on Bronze, an Adept and Engineer, chugging away. We wipe at wave 3. Get a level, still wipe. Manage a few more games of wipeouts then he has something else to do. My readiness had raised a paltry 2%. Then I saw that hard work go away when my rating dropped back down to 50% the next day. That pushed me into trying public matches.

I’m really glad it did. Seriously you guys, I’m having more fun with multiplayer than I am in my current renegade play through. I have devoted hours and hours into multiplayer, and even some money.

The best thing about this though, I haven’t been harassed at all. I use my headset, I am not hiding my female gamerness from the masses. Everyone I’ve run into has been really cool. We joke around, get our strategy on, and share the joys and pains of a tough match. A good chunk of the people I’ve played with have been added to my friends list. Some of them have become actual friends. This weekend I’ll be spending a lot of time with them as we kill ALL the Banshees for Operation: Silencer.

Maybe the Mass Effect fans are of a different quality than the avid players of other online First Person Shooters. Maybe I’m incredibly lucky to have encountered the players that I have. No matter what the circumstances, I’m thankful for the friends I’ve made on Mass Effect Multiplayer.

So to all my fellow N7 Special Operatives, you fucking rock, thank you for not being dicks, and let’s go kill us some goddamn Banshees!